Відео

Sometimes they will "let you talk" - in fact, they actually SAY that, like they're in control and going to be gracious and allow you to speak. Then, after a moment of feeling heard and cared about as you let yourself feel human and get enthusiastic to share, too, you'll see them zone out and while you continue to force yourself to speak, you look for signs of connection and there's none. Then you try to stop or drift off because it's torture to keep pretending they care, they'll call you out and force you to continue, even as they look around in distraction, watch a tv over your shoulder, check their phone, start to have a shaking leg or even fall asleep. It's like they do this to exhibit that you shouldn't have tried and you train yourself over time not to bother. All while they get to claim that they "let you talk" too, so, like what's your problem? The whole attempt at anything normal, healthy or sane in a relationship like this with a narcissistic person is so dehumanizing, over time it brings you to your knees. Completely.

I am a South African woman and I wish this can be brought to light in my country. We are currently so focused on gender based violence but the issue of emotional abuse is not being addressed. It's huge problem. I know because I have never been hit but the emotional abuse I experience daily is unbelievable.

I need the following: BELIEF SUPPORT EMPATHY PRACTICAL HELP REST MAC AND CHEESE

My boundaries are never respected by my husband. He makes it clear that no boundaries are allowed in marriage. When I married him, he says I made a covenant with him that I will love him no matter what and that doesn’t include boundaries.

I’ve had 1 Corinthians 7 thrown in my face for most of my 28 1/2 years of marriage 😭 I don’t even know what to do anymore. He says until I obey that, our marriage will not be better and that I’m sinning. My husband says if I was truly surrendered to Jesus, I wouldn’t deny him sexually. He believes that in a marriage, it is a sin to say no, ever.

I’m told I’m always to obey the Bible no matter what. I’m to respond in a Christ-like manner. If I don’t, I’m sinning. I’m also told that no matter what, I’m still supposed to be giving him sex, no matter what. I’ve dealt with 28 1/2 years of emotional and spiritual abuse 😭

I have to isolate myself in my own bedroom in order to cope

Thank you for this!

The first point hit me hard. It's true, as are all your points. Then there is the one thing I can't overcome, that is when trying he turns everything over to that's what happens to him by me. It is a vicious circle of trying and failure. A madness inside me brain that has a hold on me.

I remember when my kids were little there was something that I did not want them to do when they were at their dads. It was a video game that if they missed a day there, PET would start starving. It was about pets and that’s just traumatize them because they had a hurry and so many hours to feed the pet or take that pet for a walk. It was horrible horrible! Yes, I agree video games suck people in and many are demonic and that’s what a lot of these were intended to do to rip up families and homes and relationships. Thank you for all your videos. From JANESVILKE, WI

Not typically a man....Spiritual bypassing is avoiding the work of self or relationship... replacing the relational w the pseudo spiritual.

Thank you for the videos. God bless you. From JANESVILLE, WI

❤what consequences do you ñut for lying?

❤love this

A friend. One single, honest friend

Why you only say man ?

Reciprocity is a feature of a healthy relationship. That is the basis of any healthy relationship, and the lack thereof is a sign of a dysfunctional situation.

I need help 😢

I am the ADHD half of a “neuromixed” marriage. In my mid 50s now, I was diagnosed in 1995 during my EIGHTH year (!!) of undergrad school, first met my wife in ’98, we married in 2001, and we will celebrate our 23rd anniversary in a few weeks. So much of Dr. Hunt’s talk hits home, just one observation I’d like to share… Each partner in any marriage brings to the table their own unique sets of strengths and weaknesses. When one partner has ADHD and the other doesn’t, there will likely be a wide gap between those sets, and the ADHDer’s strengths and weaknesses may seem unusual, difficult for the non-ADHDer to recognize and interpret much less appreciate. This leads to misunderstanding, miscommunication, and conflict, and in time a destructive pattern develops and snowballs. But adjust the lighting a little and you may find that the two sets of strengths and weaknesses actually complement each other in significant ways. She’s really good at important things I’m not, and I'm really good at important things she's not. With some acknowledgement, accurate understanding, and a little humility and cooperation, this can be an incredible opportunity for both to grow and learn and become closer. Maybe it’s ADHD magical thinking-that is an actual thing-but I am convinced we found each other and have remained together because we each have something to learn from the other, because we and our strengths and weaknesses do complement each other in fundamental ways, and because we care about each other to a degree that is difficult to articulate. Our relationship is not without some turbulence, but every relationship has turbulence, and navigating those times is what "relationships take hard work" refers to. But if both partners are in the relationship out of genuine affinity for the other at the deepest level then it’s worth that effort. Anyone out there struggling in a “neuromixed” marriage, regardless of which half you represent, I’d urge you to look deeply for those strengths and weaknesses in both yourself and your partner and to examine them closely. You may find that they do in fact complement each other, and that with a few modifications in effort and emphasis from both of you-adjustments that may never occur to you without looking-you can actually leverage those differences for the better. There will still be struggle and conflict, that's part of being married. But you may find not only that it’s manageable, but potentially more fulfilling and rewarding for both of you than either of you ever imagined.

Abusers are parasites.

Yep check all 10

I had 8 for sure of the 10 I was married 36 years until he passed in ‘22 cancer thru therapy I learned he had MWC Madonna syndrome so our marriage became sexless no matter what I did to change it he was addicted to porn and as a child went through extreme abuse sexual and physical so I stayed trying to fix us nothing worked

I helped him recover from health issues, as he got stronger I got weaker, today I lay on my bed, he’s up early exercising, I can hardly move

(Irena, NOT JAY!, i.e. not my account!) I still believe there is hope, but at the same time it is crystal clear to me that to offer assistance in this case is a true gold mine, because the so called narcissist will certainly need this this for quite some time and may possibly be even as effective as so called spiritual healing or even the lottery! Very, very clever, Sir!

Some spouses use their spouse for finances and or.to hide behind in society. These kinds of.people will negoect your words and emotions because they need you to survive.

😢

I’m sick of being stuck along self-centered, obnoxious, too proud, ignorant, sarcastic, annoying, too self -respectfully for themselves, overly negative and I just wanna move on and forget about it all and live life like no other again like I used to.

I was emotionally abused by my mentally ill mother, then married 2 mentally and emotionally abusive men. My house is finally peaceful but sometimes I get lonely.

I don't think I've been asked how my day went in three or four years. The silent treatment was the weapon of choice. I used to try to figure out wtf I did or said and half the time I didn't have the first clue.

It's to late, after 50 year I'v lived with this. I see my whole relationship here. I've shut down my whole sex life for over 20 years.

I can identify with every single thing that you have said 😢

There’s a millions videos to help women cope and escape accountability. Not much for men out here. We suck it up, whether at work, home, or anywhere in the world. We take whatever comes our way and find a way to keep going. We don’t get the luxury of stopping and pointing fingers, whining about our feelings, or dwelling on all of our lives problems. We wouldn’t function if we did. Hmm….it honestly should work both ways ladies.

I had suicidal thoughts when my kids were younger. Since I decided to leave and then left in 2021, those feelings have disappeared. I have forgiven myself for staying so long. Intuition and gut feelings must not be ignored. They are there to keep us from harm, especially emotional and spiritual harm. 🌸✨💓🙏🌈

Sir Tom Jones?

I'm dealing with this an an independent contractor valued by my client company boss, but an outside consultant consistently undermines my work... trying to gain power and edge me out of a job. Other consultants have approached me about this individual advising what this person is doing and saying to others about me, when I already experienced his covertness. Currently my approach is charging a 65% interference fee on top of my monthly bill, to cover my frustration and any additional medical needs, until I move on from the client company. Definitely a crazy maker. Client boss wants me to work with this crazymaking consultant, I don't. Client boss doesn't see the issue, I do. Terminating my client would be career and financial disaster at the moment until I complete this particular assignment in a couple of months and charge the ongoing interference fee. But it definitely is abuse in the workplace. Thanks for the clarification of overt and covert. Change is a coming - either for me or my client company!

I can relate to all 10

Thanks for acknowledging this is a worse type. Because it *really* is.

The mental emotional verbal and physical abuse to my brian couldn’t handle the constant building up of stress confusion sadness depression and anxiety…it all came out in the form of panic attacks and emotional meltdowns… it was too much for me to handle. I don’t think my head and my heart are built to handle that kind of long term turmoil. After 2 affairs and denial… Thank you because I didn’t understand what was Happening to me.. Now that I know… for the past 24 hours. I feel so much better and know that I can control myself now… just knowing that this was caused by my abuser… I don’t want to be like him. And I have admitted to the few people know of my abuse for over the past 6 years. This is not me. And I will not become like him. Self control is myself. I will not allow his evil to be part of me.

I needed a word for what I am feeling.

Mixed data. Difficult, painful subject. So appreciate Dr. Hunt!

Just leave- He will never change. He will ruin your life and your relationships. Leave now. Avoid the sunk investment fallacy. Just go, and rescue the rest of your life!

That was good and so accurate. I can say this now walking in my healing in the recovery. It's amazing and I never thought that I could be here. Thanks for all your help and validation during a time when there was no hope. I thank God for you and your team. Be blessed 🙏🏾❤

My husband has bipolar/ADHD and is a narcissist. Was married for seven years and then divorced in 2017. We went on our paths. Three years ago, we remarried and bought another home. Well, he drinks and smokes weed on top of taking psychotropic medication for is bipolar and adhd. He makes my life miserable, constantly telling me im cheating on him, etc. I begged him to stop. I gave him forwarding if he doesn't stop. i would move out. Well, i moved out.!!! Life is better for my dog and i. He still calls and texts, trying to control me. Thank God im in counseling for this matter. It's ok to self-love. Im on my way to healing.

Intuitively, I have been doing all that you have suggested. I am the wife. Why is it; the narcissist can be so engaging, so cordial and even appear to be such a sweet soul to all others that pop in and out of his life. It is less than a handful of friends who have had a glimpse of his narcissistic tendencies, but time seems to create an amnesia as to their own personal experience. This also appears to be the case with family as well. I do have the possible reasons as to why, but it absolutely leaves me to take the full brunt of his bad behavior without support. BTW. In true narcissistic fashion, my few assets and personal ownership of anything I had pre marriage were efficiently transferred and managed in his Company named trust, which “is” him and if something should happen to him; it will go to his children. My reality is I now own nothing, my name is on nothing and I have absolutely no access to credit or money without him instantly knowing of the transaction made. I no longer am able to make a living due to my worsening health condition and due to his tight control over my existence, he keeps me very busy and on a tight leash as a servant to him 24/7. With technology, he has the ability to see my activities and location all of the time. I know the stress I am under is not good for me, but I have no one to turn to, no way to support myself. What I do have is my strength in knowing who I am, who I am dealing with and the ability to set boundaries and to call him out on his bad behavior. BTW. As you said, it does not affect him, but it does make me feel better. I see him as an entitled toddler; throwing tantrums, no logic, no true empathy for anyone other than himself. The irony is this toddler had quickly and masterfully has successfully imprisoned me. Yes, I could leave, but to a temporary shelter, homelessness? I have no family or friends that would fully support me. As I see it, these are my only two choices and I am sure he knows it. Again, than you for your channel. It helps to know I am at least on the right track with what little control and mode of protecting my sanity.

Thank you for sharing your knowledge.

Lord, let the devil, narcissists flee!!!!..... scatter, get out!!! Amen and Amen🙏👑🙌💪🖐️🌹💯🙂 James 4 : 7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Let us therefore come boldly before the throne of grace, that we may obtain and find grace to help in time of need. Hebrews 4 : 16 Isaiah 41 : 10~ I will not fear, for you God is with me, and I will not be dismayed, for you are my God. You will strengthen me and help me, you have, and will continue to hold me with your righteous right hand.

Hi my name is Sherell I am a Survivor of domestic violence and everything the Doctor stated has to happen to me, my adult daughters don't speak to me either but there was a time we were both abusive each other but God help me change to where I don't tolerate any abuse and now I demand respect and I live in a whole another city and state and I am willing to forgive at at a distance, my ex has punished me through using my adult daughters as flying monkeys to be messengers and I found myself being a victim and my adult daughters are narcissistic also like my ex, I believe I use to be narcissist as well but they won't let me have any visitation with my grandbabies, this is a long story many times I ask for forgiveness but they won't and they have been very disrespectful towards me. We all live in separate places from afar.

I have no place to go to and even when I try, I fail at it. People keep betraying my trust in the mist of me leaving. They don't understand I am being abused and am feeding this person information about me leaving which causes me to be abused and so I lie to keep the peace and to keep from getting kicked out.

Carefully chosen words. You’re awesome!

I love this conversation.